Henry VIII – The most desperate King?

Henry: Walk with me advisors, whatever names you own

Simon: I am Simon your Worshipfulness. Simon of the Seven Sceptres.   I fought with you at the battle of Boulogne. I am honoured to be walking at your side

Henry: By my side? Get back you foul smelling miscreant

Stanley: I’m Stanley. I’ve merely served 17 years at court however Stanley is quite long to remember at two syllables.

Henry: Silence fool!. I want to know how I’m viewed by my people after that unfortunate incident with the tomato

Stanley: That was accidental Sire, I saw the lady trip myself which sent the officious vegetable flying

Simon: To be sure, your people adore you Sire. They gaze at you longingly, hoping for any projection of spittle that might pass your lips. Your battles, all victorious

Stanley: And your glorious search for marital bliss, endless

Henry: Witches all of them. Plus a few slipped the block.  You think I’ll be remembered for them?

Stanley: No Sire. It was a mere situational peculiarity

Henry: Indeed. I was greatly wronged

Simon: Heart wrenching for such a glorious leader. The Rays of God himself shine joyously upon your shining visage

Henry: It is true.  I was called Adonis, fair of calf.

Stanley: Indeed Sire. A long time ago

Henry: Not so long ago

Simon: No Sire, thou art fair of calf and muscular still

Stanley: No one will ever wonder how such fair calves support such a grand frame.

Henry: Grand indeed

Simon: And such a glorious thatch of red hair

Stanley: that shines like the most succulent of carrots.

Henry: Hmmm enough. I want to be known as a fair and wise king, not just devastatingly handsome. All must come to love me such that echoing my names makes babes weep that they will never know my grandeur.

Simon: And your humility

Henry: That too

Stanley: Piety

Henry: ah yes, I do pray to God.  It isn’t cursing

Simon: Charity

Henry: At times. To my friends. Such wonderful parties.

Stanley: Insightful

Henry: In many ways

Stanley: Yes sire.   Material possessions will never nourish the soul

Henry: Quite so

Stanley: Indeed Sire how your people rejoice for the treasury that flourishes like a field of golden daffodils, Ruby roses, and sapphire bluebells. A glory of colour

Henry: A beautiful picture, kept safely with me

Simon: And the love your people bear you Sire

Stanley: Is the strength of a glorious candle flame that flickers on the raft of a stormy ocean

Henry: You think me stupid boy? I could easily extinguish you too

Simon: He meant the strength of the ocean your Majesty

Stanley: Indeed. My expression was not quite accurate Sire, from the depths of my soul I apologise

Henry: You tire me. Leave

Stanley: Yes Sir

FX: Door closes

Simon: You could have got us killed. Bloody candle!

Stanley: Yes it was stupid of me

Simon: It’s dangerous to be so careless, we must not speak our minds

Stanley: Indeed only to each other must we acknowledge that King Henry ‘s most memorable feat is the lengths he went, to get a shag from the Boleyn woman

Simon: An entire nation in turmoil. If only he’d been satisfied with Good Time Gertie from the Fish and Spear

Stanley: As fine a filly as any. And you get used to the scratching after a month or so

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