Henry: Walk with me advisors, whatever names you own
Simon: I am Simon your Worshipfulness. Simon of the Seven Sceptres. I fought with you at the battle of Boulogne. I am honoured to be walking at your side
Henry: By my side? Get back you foul smelling miscreant
Stanley: I’m Stanley. I’ve merely served 17 years at court however Stanley is quite long to remember at two syllables.
Henry: Silence fool!. I want to know how I’m viewed by my people after that unfortunate incident with the tomato
Stanley: That was accidental Sire, I saw the lady trip myself which sent the officious vegetable flying
Simon: To be sure, your people adore you Sire. They gaze at you longingly, hoping for any projection of spittle that might pass your lips. Your battles, all victorious
Stanley: And your glorious search for marital bliss, endless
Henry: Witches all of them. Plus a few slipped the block. You think I’ll be remembered for them?
Stanley: No Sire. It was a mere situational peculiarity
Henry: Indeed. I was greatly wronged
Simon: Heart wrenching for such a glorious leader. The Rays of God himself shine joyously upon your shining visage
Henry: It is true. I was called Adonis, fair of calf.
Stanley: Indeed Sire. A long time ago
Henry: Not so long ago
Simon: No Sire, thou art fair of calf and muscular still
Stanley: No one will ever wonder how such fair calves support such a grand frame.
Henry: Grand indeed
Simon: And such a glorious thatch of red hair
Stanley: that shines like the most succulent of carrots.
Henry: Hmmm enough. I want to be known as a fair and wise king, not just devastatingly handsome. All must come to love me such that echoing my names makes babes weep that they will never know my grandeur.
Simon: And your humility
Henry: That too
Henry: ah yes, I do pray to God. It isn’t cursing
Henry: At times. To my friends. Such wonderful parties.
Henry: In many ways
Stanley: Yes sire. Material possessions will never nourish the soul
Henry: Quite so
Stanley: Indeed Sire how your people rejoice for the treasury that flourishes like a field of golden daffodils, Ruby roses, and sapphire bluebells. A glory of colour
Henry: A beautiful picture, kept safely with me
Simon: And the love your people bear you Sire
Stanley: Is the strength of a glorious candle flame that flickers on the raft of a stormy ocean
Henry: You think me stupid boy? I could easily extinguish you too
Simon: He meant the strength of the ocean your Majesty
Stanley: Indeed. My expression was not quite accurate Sire, from the depths of my soul I apologise
Henry: You tire me. Leave
Stanley: Yes Sir
FX: Door closes
Simon: You could have got us killed. Bloody candle!
Stanley: Yes it was stupid of me
Simon: It’s dangerous to be so careless, we must not speak our minds
Stanley: Indeed only to each other must we acknowledge that King Henry ‘s most memorable feat is the lengths he went, to get a shag from the Boleyn woman
Simon: An entire nation in turmoil. If only he’d been satisfied with Good Time Gertie from the Fish and Spear
Stanley: As fine a filly as any. And you get used to the scratching after a month or so